Nothing to Fear Read online

  An image of her mother lying dead on the floor stabbed into her mind and she clutched her stomach in pain. OK, so she knew why she couldn’t fight.

  “Maybe we should do some self-defence classes. I’m sure Lincoln can teach us a few things.”

  It was a good idea, and she trusted Lincoln. Perhaps if she knew what to do, she wouldn’t freeze. “I’ll ask him about it tomorrow.”

  “So what do you want to do tonight?” Fleur asked as she walked back towards the kitchen.

  Hannah cringed. “I’m, uh, actually going on a date.”

  “What?” Fleur whirled around and stared at her.

  Hannah winced. “Ryan arrived when Justin had me trapped. I needed an excuse when Justin asked me out, so I said I was going out with Ryan.” She should have said no and not given him a reason – he didn’t deserve one. “Now, Ryan believes it’s a good idea that we have dinner in case Justin is around town.”

  “I’m sure he does.” Fleur’s smile was quick, but then she sobered. “Are you going to be OK? Do you want me to be nearby just in case?”

  When had she become this timid, useless woman whose friends thought needed help? She didn’t want to be helpless or useless or so damned scared all the time. Hannah shook her head. “No. I’m sure it’ll be fine. It’s not a real date.” Maybe if she said it enough times she’d believe it.

  “I’m only a phone call away if you need me.”

  “Thanks.” It did make her feel better. Going out in Blackbridge felt safer because she knew so many people. They’d all be keeping an eye on her.

  “So what are you going to wear?” Fleur asked, her eyes shining.

  Hannah smiled at Fleur’s enthusiasm. “I brought options. I haven’t been on a date since …” Her optimism deflated. “Justin.”

  “Then it’s past time you went out again.”

  Fleur was right. She was taking the first step towards a normal life, even if tonight wasn’t real.

  “You can help me decide.” She headed towards the guest bedroom.

  A couple of hours later, Hannah smoothed down the front of the green summer dress she was wearing. The low, strappy white heels were already making her feet ache a little as she paced across Fleur’s living room waiting for Ryan. She fiddled with her hair, not sure whether the gel she’d put in was going to last the night.

  “Stop that.” Fleur lightly slapped her hand away. “You’ll mess it up. You look gorgeous.”

  “It’s not too much is it?” They weren’t going on a proper date. She didn’t want Ryan to think she was interested in him. Even if she kind of was. Which was stupid. He was doing her a favour – he barely knew her.

  “It’s perfect,” Fleur assured her as there was a knock on the door. “That’ll be him now. Right on time.” She hurried to answer the door and Hannah followed, her chest tight. Slowly, she let out the breath she was holding.

  Her footsteps faltered as Ryan filled the doorway. His blue jeans were snug and the black V-neck shirt clung to his broad chest, showing off his muscle definition. She itched to run her hands over his chest, and the depth of her desire startled her. She shook her head. That way led to danger.

  “You take care of my girl tonight,” Fleur said.

  Hannah winced. She wanted to be able to take care of herself. “We’ll be fine.”

  Ryan looked over and his eyes widened. His smile was warm and genuine, and it sent a thrill through her. “Hannah. You look lovely.”

  She brushed a hand over her dress, avoiding his gaze as her cheeks heated. “Thanks. So do you.” She groaned inwardly. This was awkward. “Shall we go?”

  He nodded. She told Joe to stay, fighting the unease of going out without him. Nothing bad was going to happen.

  As they walked out to his four-wheel drive Fleur yelled, “Have fun!”

  Ryan opened the door for her. “It’s a bit of a step up,” he said. “Do you need a hand?”

  The thought of Ryan’s hands on her heated her body. “I’ll be fine,” she said quickly. “Thank you.” What was wrong with her? Her body was behaving completely inappropriately. She climbed into the car and adjusted her skirt as he went around to the driver’s side.

  Backing out of the driveway, he said, “I’ve booked us into Little Italy.”

  Hannah grinned. “That’s my favourite restaurant.”

  “Lincoln recommended it.” He cleared his throat. “If we do see Justin, we should probably hold hands or something.” His expression was apologetic. “To make it appear like we’re serious and hopefully he’ll leave you alone. Are you OK with that?”

  For the first time in a very long time, the idea of a man touching her wasn’t so scary. But she couldn’t get carried away – this was pretend. “Sure.”

  “Good. Lincoln and I want this guy to get the hint that you’re not interested.”

  “Me too.”

  He pulled up to the restaurant. “Wait there.” He got out and hurried around to open the door for her.

  Heat rushed to her cheeks. It was such an old-fashioned gesture and it made her feel special. “Thank you.”

  He took her hand, his grip warm and gentle. Her pulse raced in response, more attraction than fear. She would enjoy it while it lasted.

  Inside the restaurant, the maître d’ grinned. “Hi, Hannah, how’s it going?”

  “Fine thanks, Torben. This is Ryan. He’s our new senior constable.”

  “I’ve got a table booked under Kilpatrick,” Ryan told him.

  “Of course.” Torben checked his book. “This way.”

  There were questions on Torben’s face. Hannah hadn’t considered this aspect of the date. The whole town was going to be buzzing that she had been out with the new cop. She hated gossip, but it couldn’t be helped.

  After he had given them menus and left, Hannah glanced around. She knew quite a few of the people there and they were watching them with interest.

  “Is everything OK?” Ryan asked.

  “Do you realise we’re going to be the talk of the town tomorrow?”

  “Really?”

  She nodded and scanned the restaurant as Justin walked in with two other guys. She stared, her chest tight. He’d said he was going out tonight, and there weren’t that many restaurants in town for him to choose from. It had to be a coincidence that he’d chosen the same one she was in.

  “It’s all right, Hannah. He can’t hurt you here.” Ryan’s words were soothing and he brushed her hand, the warmth sending tingles up her arm.

  “I can’t help it.” She sighed in frustration. “I want him to leave me alone.” She wanted to keep an eye on Justin, know exactly where he was. Having him behind her somewhere made her skin crawl.

  “He’s looking right now.” Ryan’s smile was slow and wicked. “Laugh as if I’m the funniest guy in the world.”

  His words made her genuinely laugh and she resisted checking Justin’s reaction.

  “We should give him a little bit of a show,” Ryan continued. His fingertips caressed the back of her hand and a burn started in the bottom of her stomach. It was such a foreign sensation, but it was pleasant. A tiny part of her wished the display wasn’t a game.

  “Can you pretend I’ve captured your heart?” he asked.

  It was easier than she’d like it to be. She was attracted to Ryan. It made her more confident. She could do this. She linked her fingers with his.

  “Absolutely.” She winked.

  He brought her hand to his mouth and kissed it, his lips warm and soft against her skin. His breath tickled her. “Shall we order?”

  She was caught in his gaze, his hazel eyes watching her, waiting for her reaction. She nodded, unable to speak, and drew back her hand. His gaze was intense, but she wasn’t afraid.

  “Hannah, what a coincidence.”

  Justin’s voice shocked her out of her trance. He was within touching distance and Hannah pushed back her chair, her heart racing. For a second she’d forgotten all about him.

  “Can we join you?�
� Justin asked, picking up a chair from a nearby table.

  Hannah couldn’t speak, couldn’t even process his words. He still wore the same overpowering aftershave, and the stench took her right back to that night.

  “No.” Ryan’s voice was firm.

  Justin halted halfway through sitting and stood up again. “Oh. Right. Sorry.”

  One of Justin’s friends laughed. “They’re on a date, idiot.” He followed Torben to a table behind Ryan.

  Justin’s face flushed and he put the chair back. Without another word he left.

  Hannah flinched as Ryan took her hand. “You’re safe, Hannah.”

  She blinked and tore her eyes from where Justin was sitting facing her. “What?”

  “You’re safe,” he repeated. “I won’t let anything happen to you.” He was watching her like she was a skittish horse.

  Hannah let out a deep breath. She could do this. She could enjoy dinner with this kind, gorgeous man. And she had Justin in her sights, so he couldn’t sneak up on her. She would be fine. She opened the menu again. “I have so many favourite dishes,” she said, trying to get her equilibrium back, trying for normal, casual.

  “Great, maybe you can recommend something.”

  She couldn’t focus on the words in front of her. Her eyes kept flicking to where Justin was sitting. She cursed inwardly. This was ridiculous. To regain her composure she asked, “Are you enjoying Blackbridge?”

  “So far.” Ryan smiled. “Felix has been talking non-stop about the Zanettis’ cheese factory and today he had a great time playing with Jacob. They’re going to be good friends.”

  Hannah liked the way Ryan’s face lit up when he spoke about his son. “Where is he tonight?”

  “Lincoln is babysitting. When I left they were talking about movies, popcorn and chocolate.” He laughed. “I should leave Felix there overnight and then Lincoln will discover what a sugared-up eight-year-old is capable of.”

  “He’d definitely deserve it,” Hannah agreed. “So, you two kept in touch after you left Blackbridge?”

  He nodded. “It was Lincoln who convinced me to become a cop. We went through the academy together and then I got posted to Karratha and he jagged a posting here.”

  “What was Karratha like?”

  “It was an experience.”

  Torben came to take their order.

  “Do you want to share a bottle of wine?” Ryan asked.

  “No.” She shook her head. Alcohol and dating weren’t a good mix. “I, uh, don’t drink much. I’ll have a lemon, lime and bitters.” She didn’t want anything to skew her judgement tonight.

  “All right.” He ordered a beer and after Torben left he said, “Tell me about the retreat you’re building.”

  Hannah sat back. “Are you sure? I need to warn you, once I start I’ll probably bore you to tears.”

  His laidback grin had her smiling in return. “I don’t bore easily.”

  “I’m beginning with the cabins,” she said. “Ten in all, spread out over the property, so they can’t be seen. Each one is going to be like its own private hideaway.”

  “If they’re all like my cabin, they’ll be wonderful.”

  “Thank you.” She beamed at him, pleasure rushing through her at his compliment. “I’m going to set up a couple of walking trails through the bush as well as a path down to the beach, and offer a booking service for those who want to do things outside of the property.” Torben delivered the drinks and she took a sip. “When that’s finished, I’m building a conference facility in the middle of the property. I want to put on different kinds of events there: writers’ and artists’ retreats – get a high-profile teacher in and have a week or weekend of intense creativity.”

  She wanted to provide experiences for people, things they would remember and enjoy. She wanted to bring joy to people’s lives.

  “Sounds ambitious,” Ryan commented.

  She nodded, the nerves always there when she thought about it. She couldn’t afford to fail. “It’s a five-year plan,” she said. “After the cabins start bringing in money, I’ll work on the conference facility.”

  “That’s great.” He held up his beer bottle. “Here’s wishing you every success.”

  Hannah gently tapped her glass against his. “Thank you.” She took a sip. “So, tell me about Karratha. I’ve never been that far north.”

  “It’s red, dry and dusty,” Ryan said. “But the people are nice, and the landscape is incredible. I used to take Felix camping when I had a few days off, and at night the stars were so bright and it was so quiet you could hear yourself think.”

  His enthusiasm captured her, but he didn’t mention his ex. Dare she ask? “Sounds lovely. Why did you move?”

  He pursed his lips and his eyes lost their passion.

  She wished she hadn’t asked. “It doesn’t matter.”

  “No, it’s fine. I should get used to talking about it.” He waited until their food was delivered and then continued. “It was never really home to me,” he said. “When I split up with Felix’s mum, I decided to come back here.”

  She wanted to ask more about his ex, but it wasn’t any of her business. She tasted her pasta, the creamy sauce dancing lightly over her tongue. It was delicious. “Have you been surfing yet?”

  “How did you know I surfed?”

  She blushed. She shouldn’t have mentioned it, now she had to explain. “You and Lincoln used to go surfing all the time,” she said. “You’d park near the holiday park and I’d see you walk down.” No way was she admitting that she used to wait nearby, hoping to catch a glimpse of him. “One day when you were driving home, you stopped to help me when I fell off my bicycle.”

  His eyes widened and he grinned. “I remember that now. No wonder you looked familiar to me. Your knees were so full of gravel and you were trying not to cry.”

  “I didn’t want to seem like a baby in front of you,” she admitted.

  “I thought you were very brave.” He brushed her hand again.

  She smiled, more comfortable now. “And you were my hero. The way you picked me up and carried me to your car was like straight out of a fairy tale.”

  He laughed. “I wouldn’t go that far.”

  She tried for a playful tone. “I would. I was twelve and this dashingly handsome seventeen-year-old was rescuing me.” It was a fantasy she’d played out many times.

  His cheeks went red and he reached for his beer bottle. “You were a kid.”

  Delighted that he was embarrassed, she said, “Yeah. How I wished I was five years older.”

  He choked, almost spitting out his beer. “I didn’t even notice you like that.”

  She heaved a sigh. “I know. The girls and I had fun making up stories about you though.” It was quite amazing the shade of red he was turning. She hadn’t had this much fun with a guy in a very long time.

  He swallowed. “Well, you’re all grown up now.”

  Hannah’s smile fled. His expression almost seemed like he was interested. But he couldn’t be. This wasn’t a real date. She didn’t want him to be interested in her.

  Liar.

  She cleared her throat, not letting her agitation show. “So, who did you crush on as a kid?”

  He examined her while he thought about it. “We never hung around in one place long enough for me to really crush on anyone,” he said. “Blackbridge was the longest I stayed anywhere. There was one girl though.” He closed his eyes for a moment. “Sherry?”

  “Sherry Laverie?” Hannah asked. “Blonde hair, big boobs.”

  He nodded. “That sounds like her.”

  Hannah smirked. “Figures. All the guys crushed on Sherry’s boobs.”

  “Hey, don’t go judging me,” he protested. “I was seventeen. All I thought about was surfing and sex.”

  A memory surfaced of her Year Twelve ball. Lincoln had gathered the musketeers into a room and told them to be careful. Told them boys were only after one thing. They had laughed at his big-brother antics and
Fleur and Kit had shocked him by telling him they hoped that was what their dates were after. It had all seemed like a laugh. But only a couple of years later, Justin had proven Lincoln right.

  Her appetite left her and she placed her cutlery together in her bowl.

  Ryan brushed her hand, his eyes concerned.

  She withdrew her hand and forced a smile to her face. “Have you seen any good movies lately?”

  Hannah was disappointed when Ryan said, “We should make a move. I need to make sure Felix gets to bed.”

  Two hours had flown by. Aside from Justin coming over to the table, the rest of the evening had been lovely. Ryan was easy to talk to. “Of course.” She stood, and together they walked over to the counter to pay, Ryan’s hand brushing her lower back. Lovely tingles spread through her.

  As the waiter gave the total, she reached into her bag.

  “I’ll pay,” Ryan said.

  “Oh no, I—”

  He leaned closer and murmured in her ear, “We’re on a date, remember?” His lips brushed her cheek in a light kiss.

  Hannah’s brain short-circuited. By the time it had rebooted, Ryan had paid and taken her hand, leading her out of the restaurant. As she walked to the car, Justin watched them through the window. Adrenaline surged through her. She’d forgotten he was still there, forgotten this was all pretend. Fear pushed away the temporary attraction. As Ryan held open the car door for her, she said, “I’ll pay you back tomorrow.”

  He smiled.

  What did that smile mean? Had he forgotten this was pretend? Was he expecting more? Goosebumps rose to her skin.

  She squeezed her eyes shut. Not now. Don’t get freaked out now when things were going well. Just be alert.

  Ryan turned down the wrong street and Hannah sat up straight, blood pounding in her head. “This isn’t the way to Fleur’s house.” Had she been so wrong about him? Was he going to take her somewhere isolated where no one could hear her scream? She reached for the door handle, not sure what to do.